You cannot stop the Bear Grylls Post

You can only hope to contain it.

Little did I know when I whipped up an MS paint thought bubble over a hunky picture of Bear Grylls that this would be the post that would drive the most users to this blog. Yep, this is my most famous post.

In the months that followed, comments from the Bear Grylls Fanclub bubbled up on the blog pretty steadily at the rate of about 1 crazy person every two weeks. Here are the best ones.

FUCK... YOU... FUCKTARD. you obviously dont understand anything he does, try doing ONE of the things he does, any one. furthermore, do you think you'd do so good in a situation that he goes into, without the stuff you learn from hi. oh, and nice photo shopping, kudos to the 9 year old that did a speech bubble in paint

I'm not nine, I'm 38, but thanks.

You dont be hatin my bear grylls because you couldnt do half the shit he does.........he climbed everest bitch..........you probably live with your parents in the basement you dumb fag go eat a zebra wait bear already did that... boner jockey

Go eat a zebra?

I LOVE BEAR GRYLLS. hes awsom eand has a hilairiouse personality.

Even Bear Grylls couldn't fix this spelling. Not even if he parachuted into a library with only a Webster's Dictionary and Roget's Thesaurus.

Okay yes its true Bear did fake it, but why don;t you try and have a family while going out every other week to shoot your self surviving. I still watch his show for tips.
YourMom | 04.28.08 - 7:05 pm |

Mom? You too?

Well, since new episodes of our favorite show start on May 2nd, I thought it might be a good idea to revisit why Bear Grylls sucks.

Item #1
See how clever editing makes Bear look like he's n the middle of nowhere when really he's a short walk from a busy road.


Item #2
See how they shoot one episode in the same place they shot Jurassic Park. Stick around to the end to see the terrible wild Infants of Hawaii! Incredibly dangerous beasties!


Item #3
See the lengths they go to in order to fake things. Fake built rafts, dudes in bear suits and even buying a rabbit just to pretend he caught it, kill it and eat it. This last one is the most devastating, IMO.


Given all this, I would like to declare that the official survival expert of BuzzingFridge is Les Stroud of Survivorman. He doesn't have a crew. He's a filmmaker, too and sets up all his cameras himself. No assistance and so far, no cheating. Suck on that, Bear Grylls!

Bear Grylls saves lives then takes a sauna

Ok, my favorite things about having this crappy blog has been the random commenters that have stopped by to excoriate me for having the audacity to question the fantastic Bear Grylls. I had a sizable man-crush on Bear, but was devastated to hear that many parts of his survival show, Man Vs. Wild, are in fact staged and that his claims of being left in the wilderness with just a knife and a camera crew were greatly exaggerated.

Many of my critics pointed out that "Bear is just trying to show people how to survive and I'm just jealous and probably live in my parents' basement". Stupid critics. It therefore behooves me to point out that Bear and Man Vs. Wild is in fact credited for helping a bunch of almost naturally de-selected teenagers survive falling through ice into freezing waters. Let's give credit where credit is due.

If you'd like to see how Bear recklessly risked his life to save these kids' lives you can click here to watch the original Man Vs. Wild clip credited for helping. Bonus for the ladies as Buff Bear does some Bare-Nekkid push ups to get his blood pumping.

Never let it be said that the Fridge ain't a fair-minded individual.

Et Tu, Bear Grylls?

Seriously... W. T. F. ???

Bear Grylls, you are dead to me. No survivalist should be caught cheating so easily. What complete bullshit!

Sure, you drank the juice from fresh Elephant Dung.
Sure, you drank your own pee. But hey, who hasn't?
Sure, you fell through the ice on a frozen lake on purpose to show how we could survive that.
Sure, you ate a sheep's eyeball boiled in water boiling from an icelandic volcano.

But, dude. Seriously?

According to Weinert, while filming in California’s Sierra Nevada mountains — an episode in which Grylls, 33, is seen biting off the head of a snake for breakfast — Grylls actually spent some nights with the show’s crew in a lodge outfitted with television, stone fireplaces, hot tubs and Internet access.

I feel so dirty. So violated. You broke my heart, Bear. You broke my heart.