No alarms and no surprises, please.

Friday, January 25, 2008

Excuse me, do you have some Grey Poupon?

The long dry spell between the Conference Championships and the Super Bowl can make for some truly gag-inducing journalism. We all know this and count the days until the official national guacamole holiday. But this may be a new low. I give you Jessica Heslam of the Boston Herald.

New England Patriots fans are smarter, classier and healthier and own pricier homes than the riff-raff who root for the New York Giants - and now we’ve got the research to back it up.

oh do tell, you stuck up bitch....

We are likely to read connoisseur magazines like Wine Spectator. Gotham fans like to pig out on junk food like pretzels, chips and nuts. They’re also less likely to favor organic food than other New Yorkers

Wine spectator.... wow. You guys totally kick ass. I'm feeling inferior in my wine knowledge. Which one is is the red? Pinot Grigio or Pinot Noir?

Then she interviews a numbnuts who lives near the stadium.

“Boston fans are much classier,” said Schuster, a real estate agent and software consultant who is heading out to Arizona for the Super Bowl. “Have you ever been to Yankee stadium? I mean, they boo their own players.”

“Bostonians, in general, are better educated,” Schuster added. “New Yorkers have to send their kids to Boston to educate them.”

You just had to throw in the Yankee bit, didn't you, you pillow-biting pink sox hat wearing wuss.

Wow. Boston fans are some unlikable bastards. I now have the answer to the question of who could possibly root for such an unlikable group of assholes as these Patriots. Assholes of a feather flock together.

Go Giants!