Kid gets purple heart with Happy Meal

It's not the best picture (camera phone), but if you look at this handsome young man's forehead, you'll see a red mark. That red mark was made by teeth. Yes, someone bit my son on the forehead at McDonald's.

How the hell did this happen? Well, I'm not really sure. This is one of those McDonald's with a play scape - kind of a habitrail for human children. I usually let my kids get a bit of the manic energy out before we eat. So, I waited in line to order while they took their shoes off and played. The play area was packed. It's total chaos so I can't pay close attention to them. But they can't get out of there without me seeing them and I figure they're safe. Just after I order, I look back and see Emma walking a truly traumatized Jonny over to me. He's got a weird mark on his forehead but he's holding his composure like a teary little soldier. Initially, it looks like he was struck with forehead the end of a 1 inch pipe. I think, how the hell did he fall and get that? That toddler climbing thing is padded everywhere. So, I look closer and try and imagine what could have done that. That's when I see the teeth marks. A near perfect circle of teeth. I'm shocked. I say, "JB! Did someone bite you?" He musters up a "yeah..." and then loses it.

Now I'm stuck in line waiting for a couple Happy Meals and what I'd really like to be doing is assembling a line up so the victim can identify the perpetrator of this heinous act. I'm ready to begin the interrogation of this child by stuffing the little bastard in a garbage can. A concerned Mom in the next line over asks me what happened (they do that, those concerned moms... It's like a club when you have little kids. People who would never talk to you under normal circumstances all of a sudden have lots to say to you. It's kinda like how Harley riders give each other that little salute when they pass each other. Well, only not that cool by any stretch of the imagination. I'm in the concerned mother club) and I say, "somebody bit him." Well, there are some Mom's for whom this is a huge deal - the kind of moms who'd like to pack their kids in styrofoam until College Graduation... for them it's an excuse to panic - and this is one of those moms. She immediately scoots into the play area and decides to declare that there's a biter in our midst (!) and cause a full ruckus. The other moms leap into action. Frantically they scoop up their children and toss them into minivans. The rumor spreads like wildfire. It even makes it back to Emma, who comes over and says, "Hey dad, there's someone biting in there!" "Yeah, they bit your brother..." "Oh Yeah! I forgot!" Er, thanks for checking in, Em. The play place clears out. I should have had the managers lock the doors! Now the suspect has surely fled!

We sit down to eat, not inside the play area because Jonny is having none of that. Did you know someone bit him in there? I make sure that Jonny can see the play area though and I sit next to him so we can try and identify the perp, should he still be here and not on his way home to go to bed. One by one, I ask Jonny. "Is that him?" "No." "How bout that one?" "No." Damn. The trail is getting cold. There is one promising lead, though. There's a kid. He's 5 or so and has got dark hair (as Jonny described his attacker) and looks like, well, kind of an asshole. "JB. What about that guy? He looks shifty..." "No." "You sure?" "Yeah". Dammit!

I go into CSI mode. Bite radius! Maybe I can guess how old he is. I look at the circle. It's very small, maybe a little over an inch in diameter. "Emma," I say, "open your mouth." Hmmm... much smaller than Emma's "JB. Open yours." Definitely smaller still than JB's. That puts the perp at an age younger than our 4 year old victim. Probably closer to 1 1/2 or 2 years old. This makes a lot of sense. That's when most kids go through a biting phase - heck, Jonny did. There's one kid left in the place who fits the description. Dark hair, young. "Jonny, look at that kid. Is that the guy?" "No daddy." "Are you sure, buddy? It's ok to tell me if it is." "No, I just want to snuggle you, daddy." No justice for us today. Jonny seems to have an easier time with that than me.

Later, after eating and many, many assurances from his sister that she hadn't been bitten and it was safe, Jonny finally dares to re-enter the climbing area and come down the slide. He runs over to me with a big smile and exclaimed, "Daddy! No one bit me!"

"Woo Hoo, buddy! One in a row!"

123 Book Meme

I've been tagged by Toast with this simple meme.

Instructions:

1. Grab the nearest book (that is at least 123 pages long).
2. Open to p. 123.
3. Go down to the 5th sentence.
4. Type in the following 3 sentences.
5. Tag five people.

Here are the next three sentences.

The degree of opacity is specified by an alpha value, which is sometimes seen together with RGB as ARGB(Alpha-RGB). The Alpha value ranges from 0 to 255, where 0 is completely transparent and 255 is completely opaque. Instead of using a constructor, you create a Color object by using the FromArgb method, passing brightness settings of red, green and blue.

That riveting passage on basic GDI programming is from the nearest book to me while I sit at my desk. It's from a truly excellent book I got in 2004 about Windows Forms Programming in C# by Chris Sells. I later saw Sells present a few Topics at the Microsoft PDC in 2005. He was funny as hell. For my money, he's one of the best writers on Microsoft technologies around (He also co-wrote Essential .NET with Don Box). As of that PDC, he had just joined the development team of the WCF. Don't know whether that's still true or not.

So, not very interesting in terms of being a window into my soul or anything, but fun little meme. I won't tag 5 people because I'm passive aggressive like that, but I will tag Manuel.

Valentine's Day Sucks

I hate it, and for good reason. And not just for the cliche reasons that it's manufactured and arbitrary - which of course it is. Not because most men secretly resent having to gin up some B.S. romantic escapade on a random Thursday knowing that tomorrow, their ladies will mostly be comparing notes and trying to gauge where their man's efforts rank in the general romantic gift/evening population (although the certain sex helps). Not because of the absurd competition for presents, roses from Guatemala and reservations at hotels and restaurants that can really drive a guy nuts. Not because of the futility of trying find a stupid Hallmark card that can represent actual feelings of love. Everybody knows that stuff.

Nope, I have specific reasons to hate today. Reasons that aren't about love and bitterness in general, but this day in particular. The details of these reasons probably aren't best suited for discussion on a blog, but suffice to say that somebody done did me wrong. It involved Valentine's Day. And every year on this day I'm reminded of it.

Today, my iPod is shuffling on the "fuck you" playlist. So, take your la-de-la-lovey-dovey bullshit elsewhere. Check back tomorrow for good humor and moderation.

TOP 5 Reality Shows I've been forced to watch because of the WGA Strike

In the absence of my favorite shows on TV, I've been forced to pick up other forms of entertainment. I've been playing a little Battlefield 2. I've been re-watching the 4th quarter of the Super Bowl over and over. I've actually been getting to some of the organizational tasks I've been meaning to for so long. I've been shredding Guitar Hero III and blowing up zombies in Resident Evil 4 on the Wii. I've been watching Arrested Development on DVD. I've been watching my roomba torment my two dogs. In short, there's been plenty of stuff to do without Heroes, BSG, etc. while the writers fight valiantly for their just compensation. And of course, there's been the rare mid-season revelation of Terminator The Sarah Connor Chromicles (very long title, btw - hereafter known as TSCC).

Still, I've also meandered up and down the guide to watch some reality TV that I wouldn't have glanced at before now. Here are the ones I've come to enjoy.

1) MythBusters (DSC)- Most everyone has probably seen this show at least in clips. A couple of special effects guys lead a team of shop nerds into trying to recreate famous myths. I've watched it on and off since it came out. Once the WGA strike came, it got "season pass" TiVo status. So far, my favorite episode is the episode where they tried to build a rocket that might have been built at the end of the civil war. Apparently, there was a myth that a rocket was built that was fired on Washington DC from nearly 100 miles away. In the process, they almost burned down their shop but managed to build working missiles in two days. A lot of geeky fun here.

2) Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew (VH1)- I can't believe I watch this show, but I do. There's a dude from Grease and Taxi, Daniel Baldwin, Mary Carey (the porn star who ran for Gov of California), Brigitte Nielsen, Chyna from WWE and frankly, some celebrities I don't even recognize. Still, I can't stop watching it on VH1. This also made it to "season pass" status, I'm ashamed to say.

3) Scott Baio is 46 and.... (VH1)- I guess this show used to be "and... Single" and now is "and... Pregnant". This could be one of the most obviously "produced" reality shows I've ever seen, but I find Baio strangely compelling. I can't explain it. Maybe it's the fact that he hangs out with the dude who was the older brother on the "Wonder Years". Maybe it's because he admitted that real-life Chachi lost his virginity to real-life Joanie. Maybe it's because he was Bob Loblaw on Arrested Development. Dunno.

4) Flip This House - Step 1 - Buy a house. Step 2 - Fix it up. Step 3 - Sell it, hopefully at a profit. Why is this interesting? Damned if I know, but it is. I think I watched 4 of these in a row one boring sleepy Saturday afternoon. There's something pleasing about the "uh oh, this is more than I bargained for" followed by the "Yikes! I'm having problems with a contractor" before ultimately "Phew! Everything came together at the last minute! Can you believe it?"

5) Cheaters (G4TV) - This show is the ultimate guilty pleasure. Here's how it works. Person contacts cheaters because they suspect significant other of cheating. Cheaters covertly follows other and catches them on tape. Cheaters shows person the proof that the other is cheating. Cheaters coaxes person into confronting other, known to be cheating right this very minute. Confrontation happens, Jerry Springer-esque goodness ensues. Damn I love that show. I am a bad person.

Name The Play

BigBlueInteractive.com, my favorite NY Giants message board site, had a thread asking for a nick name for the incredible Manning to Tyree escape and throw. Here's the best one, IMO. It's from a very funny poster named 'Davisian' -

The "OMG I was like "Oh shit, he's gonna get sacked, we're gonna lose," but then Eli was all "nuh-uh, I'm gettin outta here" but the Pats guys were like "well, I'm grabbin some Jersey" but Eli was like "you can't stop me with a jersey pull" and then I was like "holy shit, he got away" but then it looked like Vrabel was going to KILL him, so I was all "Throw the ball Eli!" but then I thought about the possibility of a pick, so I was like "But don't throw a pick." Then he heaved it and I was like "Please let a Giant catch the ball" and I saw Tyree and Harrison and I was like "Oh FUCK its Tyree" but Tyree was all "Fuck yo Mama, I'm makin this catch" and Harrisonw as like "fuck no you ain't" but Tyree was like "Bitch safety getting pwned sez what?" and Harrison was like "Take THAT and THAT, but Tyree was all "That didn't hurt, I can do it with one hand and my head fool" and he held on an I was all "WOOOOOHOOOO! FUCKIN A" and the Patriots were all "Dude.. that sucked.." and the Giants were all "KUNG FUUU!" and all sorts of reactions and shit, and even though I was drunk as shit, I'll never forget it.." Play

That had me spitting coffee all over my monitor.

P.S. Leave it to Tiki to find a way to take some credit for the Super Bowl win.

Schilling Hurt?

Could it be that his arm now sucks as much as the rest of him? Apparently the Sox think so and are ready to take Curt to task over it.

Roughly a week before pitchers and catchers are due to report to spring training, the Herald has learned today that right-hander Curt Schilling has a significant shoulder injury that could end the veteran right-hander’s season and is causing tension and friction between the player and club.

While neither Schilling nor Sox officials could be reached for comment, baseball sources have indicated that the club has at least inquired about the possibility of voiding the one-year, $8 million contract Schilling signed last November. It is not known to what lengths the Sox have gone on the matter, but their threat has been serious enough to create a conflict between Schilling and the Red Sox

......

Presumably, Schilling underwent a physical exam when the Red Sox signed him to his guaranteed contract in November. It is unclear whether Schilling’s current problem was overlooked at the time or if he suffered the injury at a later date.

It's been 3 months since Schilling signed his $8 Million, self negotiated contract. Already this thing has gone south? Man, back in the good ol' days of late 2007, we were jubilantly covering 'fat' clauses and the ethics of having a $1 million bonus tied to a single Cy Young vote. Already Mom and Dad are fighting?

The interesting thing to be to follow will be a) the nature of the injury and b) what the hell each side knew about the injury before they each signed the contract. Did Curt know he was hurt and was simply trying to milk the Sox for more seed money for 38 Studios? Did the Sox sleep through the pre-contract physical? Or did they simply forget to include an "Excessive WarCraft Fapping" clause?

Regardless, I'm delighted. Not that Schilling is hurt, of course, but that there's "conflict" between the Sox and Schilling over it. Yummy, yummy Schadenfreude.

Thank You

I'll never forget this game, the play shown above, this season or this team and it's epic toughness. The last five weeks of games were simply a fantastic time to be a Giant fan. It was really an incredible run that any fan would love to have for their team. Thank you, New York Giants!

Game Day

Let's Go Big Blue!

Updated: Here's the Link to the Fark.com photoshop thread where I originally found this picture. The ones labeled not-safe-for-work should really be labeled not-clever-just-homophobic.

Just how much cheating did they do?

Fascinating, if not very enlightening article in the Times today, regarding the kid who did the actual spying in SpyGate, Matt Walsh. Here's what Walsh says he needs to have before he can talk to anyone about what he knows.

“If someone wanted me to talk and tell them things, I would craft an agreement where they would agree from now until the end of my existence to pay for any legal fees that came up in regards to this, whether I’m sued by the Patriots, the N.F.L., anybody else,” he said. He also said he would want an indemnification agreement, with the news media company paying any fines or damages found against him in court. (It is against the policy of The New York Times to be part of such an agreement.) Mr. Walsh said he sought the legal advice after receiving telephone calls from the news media soon after the taping incident. He said he did so to protect himself and his family.

and then later...

“If I ever got brought in for a deposition or something, then I would just face the whole gauntlet of questions,” he said. “There would be things I’d be forced to answer that some people haven’t taken responsibility for.”

The emphasis is mine. This truly is a tantalizing sentence despite the fact that it ends in a preposition. What occurred that has yet to be discovered? Hmm? What other sneaky tricks has the hoodie employed and what's up his sleeve for Sunday? Who knows? One thing for sure, this is not a disgruntled employee trying to settle a grudge. This dude is trying to stay the hell out of it. It will be interesting to see if lame-ass Arlen Specter comes up with anything.

Cheatin' Bastids! Go Giants!

Super Bowl Link Dump

- First up, I'm going to watch the G-Men up at Toast's place. Hope he has a defibrillator on hand because apparently sporting events can cause heart attacks. If the Giants pull off an upset, I'll go with a smile on my face, at least.

- Next, if I ever get tired of TO Crying, I'll be able to entertain myself with Romo singing Journey's Don't Stop Believing. Who am I kidding? I'm never gonna get sick of TO Crying.

- And if you think I'm picking only on Cowboys, here's an article for you. Romo may be partying with Jessica Simpson this off season, but Eli's offseason usually includes antiquing (!) Yes, clearly he really is not the typical swaggering, gunslinging, QB. Oy vey!

- Want to read a good article about Coach Coughlin, our red-faced maniacal sideline general? Here it is, from Pete Prisco who was the only beat reporter they had in Jacksonville during Coughlin's tenure. He recounts some seriously borderline control freakish behavior from the red-faced one. TC has really softened a bit since then.

- It's amazing how Tiki Barber, who was the best player on the Giants for several years, has fallen from grace with Giant fans, including me. He is a media guy who can't get an interview with his former teammates. And an unnamed Giant has said they wouldn't have made it to the Super Bowl with him because of his effect on the locker room - they refer to him as me-ki. Wow. I have to admit that it was hard not to root for Barber given how hard he worked, how good he was and how much he meant to the team. But I've never seen a guy leave and have the team turn on him like that. They must have really not liked him. Now, I don't either (and I'm almost certain that unnamed player in the second link is Strahan).

- Lastly, click here to listen to Bill Simmons' Super Bowl podcast. It's in two parts. The first half is Simmons and Aaron Schatz from Football Outsiders in "Two Pats Fans, One Cup". It's two Pats fans giggling and tying to decide if their team is gonna win - by 20 points or 30 points. The second is Simmons and Cousin Sal in the "Crying Game" with a Bitter Dallas Fan and a Pat fan trying to decide if the Pats are gonna win by 20 or 30. Man, I hope the Giants win and I can get to listen to these guys again next week.

Desktop Meme

My old school homies Wilde and Toast have started a show your desktop meme. I'm in, baby. Here's my work desktop.



Like Mr. Furious, I rock a dual monitor set up. Unlike Furious, they're only 17 inches a piece - not 20 inches (!). But, it's not the size of the monitor, it's the.... whatever.

I just use some canned background that came with Windows Server 2003 (I love Win2k3!), because this is a machine for work. I almost have both monitors covered with maximized apps. I don't adorn the background at work with kid pictures. I litter my office with them, instead. To me, dual monitors for work is an absolute must have. I always thought it was a luxury until I got a second one and now I can never go back.

I'm with Toast on the superfluous icons. They need editing. In fact, I almost never launch anything from my desktop. The only time I use the desktop at all is when I want to have a convenient place to save off throw away files. There's a couple SQL files and a CSV file that are exactly that. The rest of the icons are crappity crap and should be purged. Oh, and there is a cameraphone picture of my daughter at a birthday party when she was 4. Here's that. Far cuter than anything on my desktop.


I'll update this post from home with my home PC. That one is more personalized and I'll even take a pic of the PC itself, which I built with my own two hands. Well, that is, my two hands and NewEgg.com.

Updated: My desk is too messy for pics right now and I need to go watch LOST. But here's my home desktop. No dual Monitors here, but I am rocking a nice 22" widescreen. By far, the most expensive piece of my build your own PC. Love it. My kids look a bit stretched in widescreen, eh? If you look closely, you can see desktop icons for the glorious "orange box" and if you look REALLY closely, you might even notice that Emma and I were belting out a sweet duet to High School Musical as I was hitting Ctrl and PrtScn - I do the Troy part and she's Gabrielle. Haven't messed with my widget doohickey yet. I'm not doing my laptop, too. Too much work.

Ipod!

Some of you out there in the ether are aware that my iPod died. None of those particularly care, but I am here to bore you with the details.

On Xmas day, my son fell asleep in the car on the way to my brother-in-law's house because of the excessive strain of playing with the ridiculous bounty of toys bestowed upon him by Santa. Rather than wake him off and risk launching him into cranky 4 - year old mode, I just held him and figured that he'd eventually wake up from the chaos of all the cousins being in one house. Well, he woke up alright, but to our mutual surprise it was when he peed on both of us. My iPod was in my pocket.

Did you know there's no off switch on an iPod? Clever Apple bastards deemed it unnecessary and usually it is, unless you want to mitigate the risk of short circuits when something gets wet. Another great thing is having a removable battery. Without a power source, there can't be any short circuits. iPod doesn't have one of those either. So, I watched my little black buddy fry in silence as it imagined it was syncing with some urine laden PC.

So, that's the story of the death of my iPod. And yet, this turned out not to be unlucky tale of woe, but an excellent turn of events. See, I had randomly bought the extended warranty for my iPod at Best Buy. I never buy those things, but since I had gift cards saved up for the entire price and the idea of dropping a little hard drive was unnerving, I splurged on it. Lucky me! 50 dollar Extended Warranty + ambiguous explanation of problem ("I think the hard drive is dead" true, but not the complete truth) = 'free' upgrade to 80GB iPod Classic. Woo Hoo! I thanked my boy for peeing on me.

And that's how we get to the introductory Poddery Barn for this new little dude.

1) Marvin Gaye - "Heard it through the Grapevine" Very Best of Marvin Gaye
I do a kick-ass karaoke version of this.
2) Radiohead - "Weird Fishes/Arpeggi" In Rainbows
I am over my resentment of Radiohead for changing from being one of the greatest guitar bands ever to something else completely. This album is pretty damn good.
3) The Presidents of the United States of America - "Lump" The Presidents of the United States of America
"Lump lingered last in line for brains and the one she got was kinda rotten and insane"
4) Everclear - "Brown Eyed Girl" Songs From An American Movie vol 1
Lame cover, but this song always reminds me of my daughter, her mom and their brown eyes.
5) Coldplay - "Talk" X&Y
You know how I know I'm gay? Because I like coldplay.
6) Kanye West - "The Bounce/Two Words (Live)" The Graduate (mixtape album)
Free mixtape album that I found that's not bad. The second part they turn into an Iraq protest song. Good stuff.
7) Tenacious D - "Kielbasa" Tenacious D
"I love ya baby but all I can think about is
Kielbasa sausage, your butt cheeks is warm.
I check my dipstick, you need lubrication honey,
My kielbasa sausage has just got to perform.
Now get it on!"
8) Longview - "Further" Mercury
These dudes kinda suck. On iPod notice.
9) Dean Martin - "If" Dino - The Essential Dean Martin
"If they made me a king I'd be but a slave for you
If I had everything I'd still be a slave for you
If I ruled the night
Stars and moon so bright
Still I'd turn for life to you"
It's a long way from Kielbasa sausage to this. I love Dino.
10) Ryan Adams - "City Rain, City Streets" Love is Hell, pt. 2
Adams gets my vote for "Best Songwriter Working Today".
11) The Feeling - "Strange" Twelve Stops and Home
Clean, shiny pop songs on this album.
12) Alice In Chains - "Would" MTV Unplugged: Alice In Chains
Damn, I love this song. One of the definitive songs of the 90s.
13) Crowded House - "I Feel Possessed" Temple Of Low Men
When this album came out, I was obsessed with it. I'm certain I annoyed the crap out of my neighbors with it back in the "penthouse" of the fraternity house.

There ya go! Damn good one for the new Pods virgin shuffle.

Order it quickly! Hot off the presses!

Check out this link to the Amazon page for a certain future best-seller. 19-0: The Historic Championship Season of New England's Unbeatable Patriots (Paperback)

Who wrote it? The Boston Globe. I wonder if they're also the ones who printed "Dewey beats Truman"?

The Audacity of Plaxico

I'm really enjoying blogging the Giants Super Bowl run and the hype that surrounds it. Can you tell?

Here's the latest media lunacy. An AP article in which Plaxico Burress makes the unbelievable claim that the Giants have WRs that may be better than the Patriots. Jesu Cristo! He's cerifiably insane? Why would he want to fire up the Pats before the big game? Is he delusional?

Plaxico Burress has made some amazing catches.

And this amazing statement:

His Giants may have better receivers than the Patriots' very deep group of Randy Moss, Wes Welker, Donte' Stallworth and Jabar Gaffney.

The response from New England? No laughter, no putdowns, no he-said-what?

Just check out what happens on the field.

"The good thing about the National Football League and I think in life, you have opportunities," Patriots safety Rodney Harrison said, "an opportunity to make sure that comes to light. So we'll see."

So, what was the actual quote that led this writer to believe that Burress said that? It's found about half-way down the article after the writer has statistically debunked the ridiculous Burress claim that he paraphrased with words of his own choosing.

Burress, though, is very confident, no matter what the numbers say.

"We have guys that can go out and do things just as well or maybe better than some of those guys," he said last week.

'Just as well or maybe better than some of those guys.' Boastful prick! Someone needs to teach him some humility!

What question, would you imagine, preceded this Burress claim? I dunno, something like.... "How do you think the Giants receiver corps ranks next to the Pats?" What is he supposed to say? "We suck?" Let's look at the linked daily news article that also debunks this "claim" with stats but provides more of Plax's comments too.

Still, when asked if he would put the Giants' receivers right up there with the Patriots', Burress said, "I don't see why not. We're both going to be on the same field on (Feb. 3)."

...

"Moss is a great player," Burress said. "Welker is a great addition to what they're doing right now. What they've done as far as setting records and touchdowns and the No. 1 offense in NFL history, those guys are supposed to get a lot of credit. Definitely one of the reasons their offense is the way it is, is because of their receiving corps. I have a lot of respect for those guys. Those guys are great players. They deserve all the praise that they get."

Cocky sonovabitch!

Seriously, we need to put an idiot filter on all Super Bowl hype stories. Two weeks is just too much time to fill between games for these dopey sports writers. 'Course it doesn't help that I keep reading them all.

Easy E

NFL Films on Eli Manning. I love this video (it's short). In many ways, Steve Sabol is right. Eli is the un-quarterback. But, he's such an obviously good guy that he's easy to root for, even when he's throwing 4 INTs. Hopefully he can slouch his way to Arizona and, with a look on his face akin those seen in many a group home, lead the G-Men to a huge upset.

Excuse me, do you have some Grey Poupon?

The long dry spell between the Conference Championships and the Super Bowl can make for some truly gag-inducing journalism. We all know this and count the days until the official national guacamole holiday. But this may be a new low. I give you Jessica Heslam of the Boston Herald.

New England Patriots fans are smarter, classier and healthier and own pricier homes than the riff-raff who root for the New York Giants - and now we’ve got the research to back it up.

oh do tell, you stuck up bitch....

We are likely to read connoisseur magazines like Wine Spectator. Gotham fans like to pig out on junk food like pretzels, chips and nuts. They’re also less likely to favor organic food than other New Yorkers

Wine spectator.... wow. You guys totally kick ass. I'm feeling inferior in my wine knowledge. Which one is is the red? Pinot Grigio or Pinot Noir?

Then she interviews a numbnuts who lives near the stadium.

“Boston fans are much classier,” said Schuster, a real estate agent and software consultant who is heading out to Arizona for the Super Bowl. “Have you ever been to Yankee stadium? I mean, they boo their own players.”

“Bostonians, in general, are better educated,” Schuster added. “New Yorkers have to send their kids to Boston to educate them.”

You just had to throw in the Yankee bit, didn't you, you pillow-biting pink sox hat wearing wuss.

Wow. Boston fans are some unlikable bastards. I now have the answer to the question of who could possibly root for such an unlikable group of assholes as these Patriots. Assholes of a feather flock together.

Go Giants!

Sweep the leg, Osi!

Tom Brady is a bit dinged up. That's football for ya. It happens. However, if TMZ.com knows it, clearly the Giants know it and will certainly try and test how much it's healed by next Sunday. Is it unethical to do so? Is it wrong to literally try to hit Brady in that leg and try and make it hurt a bit - not illegally of course, but within the bounds of the rules?

Were it Eli (who separated his throwing shoulder earlier this year and played through it as I'm sure Brady will play through this), would we expect anything less than that from the HGH taking, illegally videotaping, eye-poking Pats? Don't think so.

And so, the official position of BuzzingFridge on this is "SWEEP THE LEG". Kobra Kai, baby!

Do you know what is a weird day?

The first day your daughter accidentally calls you "Dave", "Dave" being the name of your future ex-wife's boyfriend.

That's a weird day. It's a little thing - an honest mistake by a 5 year old more concerned about the flower she's drawing than who is handing her the glass of juice she asked for so politely. "Thanks, Dave- oops! I mean Daddy!. Isn't that funny Daddy? I almost called you Dave!" Yeah, it's funny alright.

It sticks with you. It's something you think about as you go to sleep that night and is still lurking in the back of your mind when you wake up the next morning.

That day was yesterday for me. I'm pleased to report that today she remembered my name right off the bat. "Good Morning Daddy!" It was a relief. I'll hope to continue to be relieved every time she calls me "Daddy" for at least a while.

Bear Grylls saves lives then takes a sauna

Ok, my favorite things about having this crappy blog has been the random commenters that have stopped by to excoriate me for having the audacity to question the fantastic Bear Grylls. I had a sizable man-crush on Bear, but was devastated to hear that many parts of his survival show, Man Vs. Wild, are in fact staged and that his claims of being left in the wilderness with just a knife and a camera crew were greatly exaggerated.

Many of my critics pointed out that "Bear is just trying to show people how to survive and I'm just jealous and probably live in my parents' basement". Stupid critics. It therefore behooves me to point out that Bear and Man Vs. Wild is in fact credited for helping a bunch of almost naturally de-selected teenagers survive falling through ice into freezing waters. Let's give credit where credit is due.

If you'd like to see how Bear recklessly risked his life to save these kids' lives you can click here to watch the original Man Vs. Wild clip credited for helping. Bonus for the ladies as Buff Bear does some Bare-Nekkid push ups to get his blood pumping.

Never let it be said that the Fridge ain't a fair-minded individual.

Way back in 1988, Eddie Murphy was clairvoyant

Source:
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Prince Akeem: Sir, did you happen to catch the professional football contest on television last night?
Cleo McDowell: No, I didn't.
Prince Akeem: Oh sir, the Giants of New York took on the Packers of Green Bay. And in the end, the Giants triumphed by kicking an oblong ball made of pigskin through a big "H". It was a most ripping victory.
Cleo McDowell: Son.
Prince Akeem: Yes?
Cleo McDowell: If you want to keep working here, stay off the drugs.
Prince Akeem: Yes.